In the afterworld there is wrestling all the time. All the time. They have water fountains that spurt cotton candy and coffee makers that run on bubble gum. The clouds are like lay-z-boys, which is going to be awesome. I sometimes can't wait to be in the afterlife because that's where angels are.

Angels are like flying mermaids with wings. They can play guitar and have voices like a herd of elephants. Sometimes when they flush the toilet it rains. Other times they have trouble on the toilet and we have thunder. My brother Todd had trouble on the toilet one time and he said he tore his poo-hole wide open. It sounded like when Hulk Hogan rips a phone book in half.

The gates of heaven are gaurded by seven naked monkeys. They eat bananas all the time and talk about cars. They weigh everyone on a big scale before they can get into heaven. If you don't weigh the right amount you won't get in. My brother Todd tried to weigh a monkey once and he got stuck in the bars of its cage at the zoo. He said his nugget pouch got bit by the monkey because it looked like a peanut. His little nugget pouch looked like a peanut and the monkey was hungry for peanuts.

Heaven is where boys and girls can hang out and do stuff. There are ping pong tables and pinball machines and god. God is super good at baseball. He plays indian rubber rules so you have to run really fast. Sometimes Jesus plays short stop if he isn't busy doing other Jesus stuff like answering the phone and turning dirt into people. When God beans you with an indian rubber ball it hurts like he threw a bowling ball. My brother Todd dropped a bowling ball on his pee-stick one time. It rolled off a shelf and flattened his pee-stick like a pancake. He said that his pee felt like sandpaper.

There are lots of old people in Heaven that already died. They're really old and wrinkly. Sometimes they die again in heaven because they're so old their bones turn into bacon. There are moms and dads in heaven too. They sleep in separate beds just like they do on earth.

heaven has one power plant to supply the whole place. It uses chinese people for fuel. When we run out of chinese people heaven will have no lights anymore. The power is used to run vending machines and vaccuum cleaners. My brother Todd got his special worm stuck in the vaccuum cleaner. He said he was playing astronaut and his special worm was running out of air. It sounded like when hulk hogan rips a phone book in half.

Heaven is a place where good people go and sometimes Jews too.